Funny usa jokes

Did you hear the joke about the Liberty Bell?

Answer: Yes, it cracked me up!

What dance was very popular in 1776?

Answer: Indepen-dance!

What did one US flag say to the other?

Answer: Nothing, it just waved!

What did the visitor say as he left the Statue of Liberty?

Answer: Keep in torch!

What do you call doing 2,000 pounds of laundry?

Answer: Washing-ton!

What do you get from an Alaskan cow?

Answer: Ice Cream

What has four legs, a shiny nose, and fought for England?

Answer: Rudolph the Redcoat Reindeer!

What is the capital of Washington?

Answer: W!

What is the smartest state?

Answer: Alabama, it has four A's and one B!

What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?

Answer: Liberty!

What would you get if you crossed the American national bird with Snoopy?

Answer: A bald beagle!

When did George Washington die?

Answer: Just before they buried him.

Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?

Answer: At the chopping mall!

Where did the pencil go for vacation?

Answer: To Pennsylvania.

Where did the pilgrims land when they came to America?

Answer: On their feet

Where do American wolves live?

Answer: Hairizona

Where do New York City kids learn their multiplication tables?

Answer: Times Square

Where do pencils go for vacation?

Answer: Pencil-vania

Which Canadian city is a favorite vacation spot for American trees?

Answer: Montreeal

Which state has the greatest number of jokes?

Answer: Pennsylvania

Why does the Mississippi river see so well?

Answer: Because it has 4 eyes!

Why is Alabama the smartest state?

Answer: Because it has four A’s and a B.

Why is it easy to get into Florida?

Answer: Because there are so many keys.

Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?

Answer: Because they’re both cracked!

Why were the early American settlers like ants?

Answer: Because they lived in colonies.

Why were the first Americans like ants?

Answer: They lived in colonies